Photon of Light Insomnia

As you know, Nutts has been bitching (again) at me for my poor sleeping habits. Even in my new year's resolutions I have included in item #15 : Learn to be a good sleeper; the doctor has prescribed me two types of benzodiazepines (fast acting + longer lasting). He once gave me Ro-E's (Rhohipnol), but I'm not that *big* so I ended up sleeping for two days. He should have thought about my weight, my body fat percentage, my absent-mindedness, and my penchant for alcohol consumption before he gave me dangerous pills like dem Ro-E's. (Ok, I should not be mixing BZ's and 'hols.) But alas, my battle to rest my brain activities is somehow on the losing side of winning, for I am just not very good at sleeping.

And this didn't start last year, or a couple of years ago. Ever since I was a little girl I have memories of tossing and turning in bed, giving up, and reading with my torch in bed. Even when I was in boarding school my bed would be the only one in the dormitory looking like a tent with light emitting from it (the only thing missing from the tent was giggling girl scouts). I had the biggest difficulities sleeping in the summer months when it gets lighter earlier, and darker later. Much later. Even the street lights used to keep me awake. Get one of those "shuts out light" curtains? Nah, they just don't work, for you see, I suffer from what I call "Photon Of Light Insomnia".

That tiny little particle is a naughty little bugger; it keeps knocking on my eyelids and wakes Nutts up. (She's a poor sleeper too) And when Nutts is awake, she wakes me up, and I make the mistake of opening my eyes... BIG MISTAKE, for, you see, that photon -- crafty bugger -- starts messing with my mid-brain and starts to play poker with the Melatonin producing cells. While my M cells should be productive, active, and doing their stuff, they are playing POKER with the fucking Photon! Bastards!!! In the meantime the GABA producing cells who should be helping everyone else "wind down, and chill-out" closes the doors and puts ear-plugs in coz it's noisy with all the gambling out there. Then those STUPID Dopamine, Noradrenaline, and all the stimulant producing cells join in, coz you can't play poker with two right? Sometimes it's even worse. Photons bring with them Mah-Jong sets, and when that happens -- oh my god! It sounds like a full-house Chinese restaruant showing horse-racing on TV!!!!

AAAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!

Photons are feckers. They piss me off. They keep me awake so now I have to take benzodiazepines -- me, a drunken wench -- to, well... pass out. (I have actually passed out in front of my PC, came to, my hands the on the keyboard, wearing my glasses.... it was as if time had juuuust stopped for only a few moments. Tad scary, but has happened a couple of times.)

I hate taking dem silly sleeping pills, because I am always not "with it" in the mornings, and my job requires me to be coherent at all working hours... so I'm going to confess to you all. (Please don't laugh...)

I *own* an eye pillow with flax seeds and lavender buds... And I cannot sleep with out it, BZ or not, I need my eye pillow to shut out those annoying photons, coz with the eye pillow? Well they can bang at my eyelids all they like -- I DON'T HEAR THEM!! HA! Photons, you aren't so smart afterall, are you!

DWR: 1, Photon: 0