One of my dear readers and commentors, Vicious Summer (who sells excellent and fantasic linergie, if you are looking for some for your special girl/guy for valentines!!) lead me to a wonderful site called: My Crazy Neighbour. Basically this lady keeps a close eye on her fucked up neighbour, Kay, for she is a danger to society (go there, you will see...)
And this reminded of my country's crazy neighbour, The Mad Hatter of North Korea, King Pong Pill -- I mean Kim Jong Il.
You don't want neighbours like him...
Anyway, before I continue to write about my WMD weilding neighbour, who is probably *right now* monitoring everything that I write -- as my inner voice speaks, and has his Russian trained snipers targeting that "spot" between my eyes so that he can wipe me out as soon as I hit the "publish" button, I remembered that I, too, have a crazy neighbour a bit closer to my home that I can mention. (without being assassinated, kidnapped, or something.)
There is an old lady who lives 3 doors down from us. Her estimated chronological age is 71, and is one of the most famous residents in our neighbourhood, for she NEVER enters her home through the front door. She never uses ANY door, you see, she moves from her lair to the outer world thru her kitchen window. Yes. Her KITCHEN WINDOW!! Combine a member of the Cirque du Solaire and a Wino and that is my contortionist, seputagenarian neighbour.
Unlike Kay, the subject of the San Diego blog, my neighbour does not ransack the rubbish bins; she is often seen climbing out of her window carrying water bottles, walking over to the nearest public park to fill the water bottles, and returns quitely back to her nest (wearing slippers). I have also heard rumours of her doing the laundry in the park, but unfortunately I have yet to witness this. She must be active during the day while I am at work.
Perhaps I can catch her on film during the holidays...
Hmm...
Right, back to my research on the Great Leader of North Korea.
(Post script: I am currently researching North Korea and the regime of King Pong Pill. If for some reason you see no more posts after this, you can assume that I have 1) been assassinated 2) kidnapped/forcefully invited over to Pyonyang 3) been asked by our "not so" intelliligent agency to answer some questions just in case I am spying on behalf of The Great Leader 4) my circus-act seputagenerian neighbour came thru my kitchen window, and killed me with her bare hands. Wish me well.)
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4 comments:
Hiya. Wonder why you chose the great leader under great duress that 'might' have had yet another attempt on his life when he returned to the country that loves him. He's a bit of a loon it appears.
Your friend Vicious is both a funny writer (love the fish) and has a great nickname (Vicious Summer!?), but no love for anonymous posters...
yes, I suppose some people don't like anonymous commentators... but yes, I love reading her dry sense of humour, and whenever I need to have a *really* good chuckle I look at the crazy neighbour archives. There are some real *gems* in there!
As for the "Great Leader" -- well, I was interested after reading a book published by a guy who used to be his sushi chef for nearly 14 years! Plus coming across random articles about KJI's eldest son being stopped at immigrations in Tokyo. His purpose of visit to Japan: to visit Disney Land...(apparently this man, in his mid 30's, is a disney fan... say no more...)
The next in line to the North Korea empire/thrown is up there (in terms of weirdness) with Whacko-Jacko, Kay, Liz Tailor, and my contortionist, seputagenarian neighbour! Cummon, you must admit there *has* to be an interesting story there!
Dang...I didn't even know I didn't accept anonymous comments! OOPS! I do now =). Great story, BTW, Drunken Wench. I can't wait until I'm old so I can act totally crazy. Another friend of mine was telling me about her grandfather who turned in his "winning" lottery ticket to the state of California to claim $18 million...He had (very obviously) cut and pasted the winning numbers onto his ticket. And he was dead serious about collecting that money. That's freakin' awesome.
aaahhh. dimentia is bliss...
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