The Best and Worst of Tokyo Restaurants

I read somewhere that there are nearly 300,000+ restaurants/eateries in Tokyo, and I can believe that. Everywhere you go one can find a small cubby-hole that caters to no more than 10 people (standing room only), and there are always people queing outside.

Today, I want to introduce to you one of the nicest, and one of the crappiest of the 300,000+ eateries in Tokyo:

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Soba Noodles @ Musashikosugi St. (buckwheat noodles):

There is a small noodle shop that I often go to in Musashikosugi station. I am usually hungry by the time I get home from the office around 9pm, or like today, I leave for the office close to noon so I am hungry -- sort of a quick brunch.

As soon as I walk in the old dear behind the counter (she's probably my mother's age) says:"you want the tempura soba, no onions, right?" Hang on, how do you know my order before I even say anything? Do you have a crystal ball there or something? What's going on??

(Laughter from the kitchen)

You ALWAYS order the same thing! the old dear is laughing at me with a cheeky grin. Hang on, am I that predictable? I don't come here every day, you have many customers come thru your doors, but why remember me?

Simple, the lady replied. You don't blanketly state your order, you say "please" and "thank you", and when you leave you always say "thank you for the meal". Must admit, we don't get too many women customers, but you, well, you are probably the most politest customer that we have. Isn't that right? She turned around to her 4 colleagues, who all nodded. I never really noticed them before, but they all seemed to know me. Yeah, and you actually wipe your table after you eat making our job easier! (umm... isn't that just plain manners?)

Here, have a boiled egg on the house.

(shit, MORE food! what is going on here?)

I ate my tempura noodles in silence as usual, wiped my table after I ate, and smiled at the lady washing the dishes: Thank's for the egg. The noodles were nice. Thanks.

You know what? You are the only customer who speaks to us looking at our eyes. You make eye contact. I hope you come again soon.

(wow, I never knew that people didn't make eye contact. These old men and women are humans, if you ask them to serve you something, how can you *not* look at them??)

I live in a foreign country....

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Bengal Curry House (Nr. Shimbashi St.):

The other day I was feeling a little bit adventurous and decided to go for a wonder in my company's neighbourhood for a new eatery. Sometimes you are lucky and you find good places, but sometimes you find "scum de la scum". Unfortunately that day was one of those days. I wanted to eat something with a kick, some spices, so I was really happy to come across the Bengal Curry House. It looked authentic, with sanskrit and wooden elephant at the the entrance and all! Cool, let's go thru it's doors, I hope that I don't have to queue for long.....

I regretted making the decision as soon as I opened the door. I was greeted by two Japanese chefs and an empty restaurant. You know that you are not in a good restaurant when you see no other customers at 12:15pm -- peak lunch time. "Irashaimase" (Welcome) We have only normal or large.

Huh?

We have only normal or large.

Ummm... I will take the normal thanks.

(What kind of establishment is this? Bengal Curry House? Oh shit, I hope they don't serve the bengal tiger, an endangered species... fuck! what did I let myself into here?)

Within a minute my Bengal "normal" curry arrived. Dear readers, I have eaten many curries in my lifetime, for I lived in England for nearly 15 years, but NEVER have I seen anything *far* from being a curry. I was served yellow goo (thickened by cornstarch) on a bed of -- get this -- sticky rice.

Sticky-Fucking-Rice!!!!!! They type of rice you make rice cakes and patties out of!!!!!

And they had the audacity to charge me 680yen (US$6.67) for yellow goo and sticky fucking rice!! And the portions were small. Even for me!!!

No smiles. No service -- get your own water, darlin'. No thank you for coming to our empty establishment....

Never again, dear readers, never.

If you live in Tokyo, and work near the Shinbashi/Uchisaiwacho area and you come across an establishment called "Bengal Curry House" (incl. fake wooden elephant and sanskrit BS.) -- avoid it like the PLAGUE! Worst curry I consumed (?) in my entire life.

Someone needs to do a serious review of the 300,000+ restaurants/eateries in this city....

And no, I didn't bother saying "Namaste" to the wankers that served me the savoury custard on sticky rice!