Leave Me Alone I Am On Vacation: Day 3

10:46 pm: I am relaxed now. It's been a long day. I was hoping that today's journey to the island would be uneventful unlike the two other days that exposed me to high adrenalin levels that should *not* have been part of a yoga retreat on a tropical island with white, sandy beaches.

The day started off just like any other morning would for a beautiful, asian lady, like me, with large tits, wearing a t-shirt that says "Sugar", staying at a swanky hotel in downtown Bangkok. I took myself to the buffet breakfast area only to be greeted by every Western man who didn't come with their wives, or their girlfriends. "Well, Good Morning"s with their lustful eyes stroking my breasts.... Pathetic beings; do they thing that I don't know what is going thru their dirty minds? Its not good morning that I hear, its "Nice tits, Babe." And I bet I am right on 9 counts out of 10. If only my Honey was with me -- he would put those creepy, overweight slobs in their right places.

Their Kennels.

The chartered minibus and my fellow yoga retreat participants, R, A-K, A-M, and M met us outside the hotel lobby. There were 6 of us: Dan, R, A-K, A-M, M, and me. The seventh person, Y who is my room mate for the duration of the retreat, was to meet us at the ferry terminal at Laem Ngop. And so our journey to the island of Koh Maak just in eastern Thailand, just off the coast of Cambodia began.

The minibus lelft promptly at 11am-ish, just according to our schedule to leave at 10:30am. I suppose we are on holiday so there is no rush, apart from the fact that we need to catch the only afternoon speedboat which left at 5pm; we hit peaktime traffic in central Bangkok, but soon we were on the highway with not much to look at apart from rows upon rows of rubber tree plantations. The journey was quite uneventful; most people fell asleep apart from me, for I was disturbed by the loud Thai music the driver was playing. Thai pop music sounds like a cross between those tunes you hear at your local Chinese store, and Bollywood theme songs. Oh and a sprinkle of Eurotrash from the early 90s. At 98DBs this is enuf to keep me pissed off for a while.

We stopped at a roadside cafe for lunch to eat some spicy, Thai-style "something-that-you-point-at-and-nod" with rice. We arrived at the pier one hour before the speed boat was scheduled to leave. Considering that we left slightly late, we got stuck in traffic, but we stuck to the speed limit (a rarity for any Thai driver), we did fine.

So far so good. What can go wrong. The boat looks in pristine condition, our luggage all loaded -- a bit crowded -- yes, but nonetheless we can all fit into without sinking the boat. The airport is at least 30mins drive from here. The probability of crazy shop assistants, and drunk businessmen ruining my holiday is remote. At least 30mins drive remote. What can possibly go wrong.

Well. The my room mate Y has not shown up. She is flying in from Koh Samui to that bloody 30min-drive airport....

Grrrrr!

(*On this journey/holiday I am haunted by episodes related to airports, what is it!!!*)

Luckily there were more people who wanted to get to Koh Maak than expected so they brought out a second speed boat to even the load. My room mate in the meantime was on her way to the pier; her flight had been delayed at Koh Samui. She eventually managed to get to us looking even more stressed than I have been for the past two days. Poor thing. I hope she can chill out.

It is now nearly day 4. I am sitting on the wooden pier on the island of Koh Maak looking up at the stars drinking my "Virgin" cocktail. The soft waves gently brushing the sandy beaches is my music right now. Everyone has gone to sleep so I am on my own. With my own thoughts. There is so much peace here.

Now I feel truely relaxed.