Sugar And Spice And All Things Nice

Ok, I fess up. I have been sober now for 18days (I think...). This is my umpteenth attempt at giving up alcohol -- the last time I gave up I did a reasonably good job and stayed sober for 6 months during which time I took up trekking, trail running, Yoga, and bouldering.... This all happened months before I started this blog.

Then one day I reset my life back to the very familiar Drunken Wench, and I cannot remember too many sober days ever since. Which is fine to a certain point, or at least it is fine by me coz I still have many sober moments -- especially when I am writing -- and the rest of the time I am enjoying the odd drink/bottle or two with my friends, and my inner voice.

Anyway, back to sugar and spice and all things nice, which is the title of this post.

Sobriety (I had to look this one up in the dictionary coz it's THAT unfamiliar a word to me) has its pros and cons. For starters off I no longer wake up/regain consciousness in the middle of the night hugging an empty Pizza Hut box not knowing 1) where it came from 2) who paid for it 3) who ate it. I do not call cabs in the middle of the night to take me to the 24hr Korean BBQ restaurant where I would consume anything from 4000 to 5000Kcal of meat, noodles, rice, desert, etc. along with another bottle of distilled liquor. I would of course puke it all up once I felt full, and then order some more (I know, it's so decadent and "Imperial Roman" to behave this way, but I just can't seem to stop it) I once even had one of the waiters wake me up at 5:30am because I had passed out at the table and it was nearly the end of his shift. (Funny, I know! I can laugh in retrospect -- oh, hang on, I was laughing at the time too.)

The other side of the coin of being sober is that I am constantly craving for sugary foods; food that my brain 15 years ago created a lovely synaptic shortcut to the "fight, freight, and flight" department of my midbrain. In short, sugar equals DANGER, KEEP THE FUCK AWAY in my mind. There is no way in hell that I am going to pick up those sweets that have been collecting dust, or going stale, in my office desk just so that I can get a sugar-rush to substitute the calming feeling of that "first drink" after a stressful day at the office. No fucking way.

The other thing I have an issue with is trying to explain to people who are very familiar with my impressive drinking habits that I am ordering "Perrier" or "Cranberry Juice" when I am out.

"Umm...Did you knock your head, DWR? You mean Diet Coke with Rum, Vodka, Whiskey, and a twist of lime, right?"

"No, I want a Perrier."

"Riiiiiggghhht." (whispers amongst themselves) Is she OK? Maybe it's that thing with Nick still affecting her. Better let her be for now. She'll soon get over him. She'll be back on the MoJo's.

No. I am going to be a Drunken Wench without any ethanol in my bloodstream. How about that for a change? Yup, I am going to spice up my life with soft drinks from now on.

(Gawd that sounds so booooorrrrrriiiiiinnnng. How am I to cope!)

Am I going to miss all the fun things in life coz I don't drink? Am I going to find new, and interesting things that would radically change my life? Maybe, maybe not. But for now, I will just settle for a substitue for my sugar craving, something non-alcoholic to spice up my drinking cabinet, and anything -- just even one thing -- that is nice.

(Post script: Please note, unless you have a high tolerance for alcohol I would not recommend downing a pitcher of MoJo in one session by yourself. It is sooooo delicious and easy to drink that you can just pack a pint, or two, in less than an hour. The results? You start to hallucinate; it feels like you have just drunk 3 bottles of Robitussin together with 1/2 bottle of scotch. "Money Back Guaranteed!". I know. I've been down those tracks before... Great recipe tho'.)